As a reminder, this is a series based on a weekend workshop I do around the country called, “Your Story: Finding Out Who You Really Are”. Of course, in order to get all the details, exercises, worksheets, activities, etc. you need to book or come to my workshop or presentations. However, you can get general information and recommended resources through this blog over the next week or so.
Please note: This series offers general information and is not meant to replace or supersede any counseling or professional advice you are receiving. All information is copyrighted. No copying or duplication is allowed without consent of author. All resources, quotes, etc. will be properly noted. I encourage you, as with any information you receive from media or related sources, to research everything written on your own and use what you find helpful.
Before we move into the fact that we are all damaged goods and how knowing that helps us to move in our purpose and potential, let’s chat about what you have written down and try to connect some things. Right now, you have a list of people, places, situations and things that have made up pieces of your life. Let’s now see how those pieces have impacted your life.
Remember your story is the same as writing a great, exciting novel. It has different components. Over the past weeks you have been working on listing those components.
Combining your earliest memories, significant characters of your life, times of significant conflict or obstacles, what you learned or experienced during a time of emotional healing, growth, understanding, life changing events, etc. (keep in mind this will be a continual process not a one-time event), and your resolution or resolve toward the future, I would like for you to now create your story.
Here are some tips:
- Try to write it as objectively as you can. Your story is not about what others did or did not do, it is about you, what you experienced, how you were and are being impacted, and how your story has been wired in the purpose of your life for the future, period.
- Cut to the chase. Write your story as though you were going to present it to a group and you were only given 5 minutes to do so.
- Do not undermine or judge your story because it lacks drama or you think your story has more worth than others because of the lack of drama. Your story is your story. It is impossible for anyone to compare their stories regarding worth.
- Your story should have four points of flow:
Your background–Your challenge/obstacle w/ journey–Your awakening– Your resolution
I encourage you to submit your stories (you can use a different name or initials if you like) so we can encourage each other in knowing we are not alone and pull from others who have common stories. Please submit your stories to me at charlotte@charlottehunt.com and I will post them or post them directly in the comment section.
Here is my story.
My name is Charlotte Hunt and I was the youngest born into a middle-class family that was greatly influenced by breadwinner and head of house known as my mother. I spent my earliest and happiest years in the care of my maternal grandparent’s house while my parents went to work and my sisters and brother attended school. Although I first tasted love from my grandparents, their love could not protect me from the sexual abuse that was taking place in my home from eighteen months old to the age of sixteen or the physical abuse that happened on a daily basis.
I learned very early in life that my worth, love and acceptance was based on my performance. That belief moved me into the world of performing arts and modeling where my sense of worth was easily filled by a well-performed song, dance routine, well-acted play, or display of skill on the runway. The harder I worked the more my identity was tied to what I did and covered the worthless feelings I felt.
During college, my life changed drastically. I began singing professionally and working with well known music jazz artists, touring with a national repertory theatre company, was an international runway model, and all while going to classes at the university for music education and psychology. My performance life was incredible but the pain I refused to deal with in my life was quickly shutting me down. On February 2, 1982, I became a Christian. Although I was a new creature and had a relationship with Christ, the reality was the baggage I walked into the door of the church with remained when I walked out the door. To make matters worse, I was told by a leader of the church who knew a little of my past that God would never use me because I was damaged goods; those word that would later guide the purpose of my life.
I felt hopelessness in believing that I could not perform well enough (which is true!) and my damage was too much for even God (big time lie!). I began a downward spiral to an eating addiction, a drug addiction, promiscuity, and eventually 7 suicide attempts. On the morning after waking up after taking a bottle of sleeping pills and alcohol, I raged at God to either let me die or show me how to live.
That morning began a rough and imperfect process of learning to be a real person instead pretending. I sought out help for my addictions and emotional healing, things got worse before they got better, but things did get better. Along the way, instead of following my career in music, a path of speaking, teaching and writing overrode my dreams. It was a path that used the very fears and issues I had and was told would be unusable to God or others to bring a hope and joy into my life that I never dreamed.
Through a long, painful and unexpected journey of counseling, struggling, falling and getting up, learning how to dream again and be enjoyed, learning the truth versus the lies of my past, finding my true identity which has nothing to do with my performance, and discovering the passions, potential, and purpose of my life, and knowing, using, and reading my story, my life will never be the same and no past or present circumstance or situation will ever stifle me or calm my voice from helping others to dream madly, pursue wildly, and trust completely. I am proud of my story because my story is not about me or the damaging events in my life. It is about the hope and freedom that has been found and is offered to others through the beautiful use of my weaknesses by Him.
Now it’s your turn to write your story.
Take care
Charlotte
Dream Madly, Pursue Wildly, Trust Completely tm
Copyright © 2019 by Charlotte D. Hunt
All rights reserved. No part of this material may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, transmitted in any form or by any means – electronic, mechanical, photocopy, or otherwise- without written permission from the author except for brief quotations in printed reviews.
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